First a funny story - yesterday we were mailing some books to my niece and I was in one of those little magazine and stationary shops that also has an Australia Post outlet in it, and I was putting the address on the bag when everyone in the shops hears a little voice say "ummm we've got a situation over here" and all the other adults in the place collapse in laughter. Cute, wonder where he learned that?

In other news, he seems ok at daycare now. I don't know if the parenting has worked or if it's that the kid who he was mostly spitting at has moved to a new daycare or what, but it seems a bit better.

He and the Wookie are no better at all, and the Wookie just keeps resetting back to nagging authoritarian parent mode, so I'm kind of at the end of my rope on that.

On the daycare front, his daycare is closing and the place will be knocked down. He seems to grasp the concept - telling me the other day that all the kids will go to different daycares after it is knocked over, but he also arcs up whenever I mention that he will be going to a new daycare next year. We did get a place at a great one, right next to the school he will start attending in February, and one of his besties goes there, so it should be all good.

As for me, one exam down, the hard one to come. Then bum down on my american politics report. No freaking idea what I am going to write about there.

Everybody reset

So after freaking out a bit about Atti's behaviour and the Wook's anger - and feeling like it was back-against-the-wall time, I did some research and was a bit proactive. I surfed the Aha Parenting website (awesome stuff) and I found an article on what to do when your child starts to bully (not sure that is what is happening, but the response fits anyway). 

I emailed it to everyone involved with Atti's care and basically said 'this is how I will be dealing with this - please be on board or I will have to take you out of the equation'. Well, I actually didn't say the last bit, but, I mean, it's implied, right?

So, we have a gentle parenting approach in hand that is about modelling behaviour, setting limits with empathy, redirecting and proactive behaviours - lets hope that gets me through the month. You know, while I have exams, final reports, and a job trial on.

Mostly I am concerned with the Wook. He is so bad at staying calm, and now Atti is totally loaded for bear. Even when they are having a great time together, Atti is always ready for a fight, and the second Wook's voice changes or he tried to be an authority in any way, they are off. So we had a talk and I basically said 'the kid is now starting to be violent. That CANNOT happen. So either you stop all this stuff right now, or you have to leave - I can't have my kid becoming violent. He has to start a new school next year and likely a new daycare too - and I might be going back to work full time. So I have to address this stuff now, it cannot wait. And if you can't be calm, you can't be here.

So he agreed to, in effect, stop parenting entirely and just be a buddy. Which I am fine with. I have said that he can not ever lose his temper with Atti ever again. It is the only way he can regain Atti's trust. And then I signed him up for an anger management course and a 'dad's parenting boys' class that is all about modelling behaviour for your son. 

So, there are some positive steps taken, and hopefully this patch can hold for the month. The one where I am insanely busy trying to prep for exams (soooo far behind) and effectively write my whole research assignment in 10 days (topic collapse, reset, start again). And I am trying out for a job which I really want (but argh, what if it's full time?) and I need to review criminal law to do. 

So, finger crossed (or find someone to sell me speed?)